The average person, if they are polite, will say the words “Thank you” multiple times a day. A recent article in the New York post cited research that shows the average American above the age of 21 uses the phrase “thank you” six times a day. When my wife and I were parenting our young children we were constantly reminding them to say thank you. Whether it was at a birthday party and they were receiving gifts or if it was in response to daily acts of service we as parents would provide, we understood the chain of giving and receiving could only be complete when "thank you" was said. While saying “thank you” is important,  being a thankful person is not limited to just uttering the polite response, “thank you” to a kind gesture.

Unfortunately thankfulness didn’t come natural for our children, which is understandable because it doesn't come natural for me as their parent. The truth is an attitude of gratitude doesn’t come naturally for any of us because our first instinct is to think about ourselves. We don’t always like to admit it, but if we are honest we know it is true.

What does a life of thankfulness look like, and how can we have an attitude of gratitude in our everyday life? 1 Thessalonians 5:16 commands us to rejoice always and to give thanks in all circumstances. How can we be thankful in all circumstances, even the circumstances that lead to pain, discomfort, and maybe even death? I think we have to start with being thankful during the good or beneficial circumstances in our life. Oftentimes we get so busy during life that we overlook all of the blessings and gifts of God that come into our lives everyday. In Seph Schlueter’s song Counting My Blessings, he says:

God, I’m still counting my blessings

All that You’ve done in my life

The more that I look in the details

The more of your goodness I find.

Schlueter highlights an important truth in living a life of thankfulness, and that is how much goodness we see in our Heavenly Father is dependent upon looking in the details of our life. Looking in the details takes reflection, it takes devotion, and it takes putting aside some of the daily distractions of our everyday life and giving our attention to our current reality. We have to purposefully look in the details, and we can’t do that when we are distracted. 

In CS Lewis’ famous book The Screwtape Letters, he writes short letters from the perspective of a senior tempter (Screwtape) mentoring a junior demon (Wormwood) on how to tempt his patient (A Christian).  His insight into the power of temptation is amazing and incredibly insightful. One of the tactics Wormwood is urged to use is distraction. Screwtape says, “A few weeks ago you had to tempt him to unreality and inattention in his prayers: but now you will find him opening his arms to you and almost begging you to distract his purpose and benumb his heart…

As this condition becomes more fully established, you will be gradually freed from the tiresome business of providing Pleasures as temptations. As the uneasiness and his reluctance to face it cut him off more and more from all real happiness...you will find that anything or nothing is sufficient to attract his wandering attention. You no longer need a good book, which he really likes, to keep him from his prayers or his work or his sleep; a column of advertisements in yesterday’s paper will do. You can make him waste his time not only in conversation he enjoys with people whom he likes, but in conversations with those he cares nothing about on subjects that bore him. You can make him do nothing at all for long periods. You can keep him up late at night, not roistering, but staring at a dead fire in a cold room. All the healthy and out-going activities which we want him to avoid can be inhibited and nothing given in return, so that at least he may say, as one of my own patients said on his arrival down here, ’I now see that I spent most of my life in doing neither what I ought nor what I liked.’”

Distraction seems to be most powerful when things are going well. When we are free from pain, sorrow, and trials, distraction keeps us from looking at the details of our life and we ignore the goodness of God. There is no hope in fulfilling the command to give thanks in the difficult circumstances of life if we aren’t used to giving thanks during the times of comfort. 

I have been pondering recently about what a thankful person would look like? I think the starting point for a thankful person is to have a right view of themselves and God. In order to be genuinely thankful you have to come to terms with the truth that you are a worse sinner than you could possibly imagine, but also that Jesus is a greater Savior than you could ever have hoped. A thankful person would also be a cheerful person. Of course it isn’t realistic to be cheerful all the time, but a thankful person will have a general countenance of cheerfulness. Finally I think a thankful person will speak a certain way. This means a thankful person would have to also be an encouraging person. They would recognize that other people play meaningful and significant roles in helping them become the person God intended for them to be. When they recognize this truth, a thankful person will express it with their words and actions. Would we remember the words of the classic hymn “Count Your Blessings”,

So, amid the conflict, whether great or small,

Do not be discouraged, God is over all;

Count your many blessings, angels will attend,

Help and comfort give you to your journey's end.

Count your blessings, name them one by one;

Count your blessings, see what God hath done.